thursday never looking back

In typical me fashion, the butterflies have grown as quickly as the doubt. After talking to a friend/coworker last night it seems this starving artist will have a job back at the old digs in Charleston. Now I should feel thrilled and relieved but I feel a little anxious. The job that I am going to be signing my life away for the next year is going to be a little more intense than I had thought. I am signing up to be the boss lady boss lady, like schedule making, payroll taking, hiring, firing, paperwork...and that makes me nervous. It was an unanimous decision that everyone there decided I was most trustworthy and the best candidate for the job. The good news is all the responsibility will come with a bigger paycheck, but I will be held way more accountable and that is scary. I was just watching the new scrubs,(Dr. Cox has been recommended to be the chief of medicine and had initially turned it down) and I realized I don't want to go through life holding myself back because of my doubts and insecurities. Maybe that's why boys seems to succeed in businesses, they don't have insecurities and doubts flooding their brainwaves, their minds just don't chemically work that way. I honestly think that is why I have never pursued being an art teacher, or why I did poorly in college as an art student. I am my own worst critic. I never feel good enough in the art world, and I have such a passion for art it is way too scary for me to really put myself out there, what if...
Well in compliance with Yes Man, I have been given an opportunity and I am going to say yes to it...so let's see where the next year takes me.